Never Let Me Go
by This is My Truth Tell Me Yours
Summary: How could the lives of two sisters, so closely interwolven, unravel like that? Even as Narcissa talks about her life, and her memories of her sisters, it's impossible to understand. Narcissa's POV / Chapter 6 is up: Aunt Walburga had always been very close to us, and that Winter, because she couldn't leave the house, father took us to Grimmauld Place to keep her company.
1. Prologue 1957

**_**_DISCLAIMER:_**_** _ _The ideas are mine, the characters belong to JK...__

* * *

 _ _"You know, most people really don't know me"__

 _ ** **Marilyn Monroe****_

* * *

 ** **Prologue (195**** ** **7**** ** **)****

The first thing I remember from my childhood is fear.

My parents used to argue all the time. They posed as a respectable pure blood family, as the name Black required, but there was very little respect between them once they found themselves away from the watchful eyes of magical society. Their words were harsh, their love non-existent, their quarrels awfully frequent. I listened to it all. The screams, the swearing, the spells missing their targets... It would be frightening to any little girl, and it was so to me.

I was the youngest of the three children born to Cygnus and Druella Black, and it was obvious that I was different from my two sisters from the very day I was born, which I was told to be a cold and foggy winter night of 1957. Both Bellatrix and Andromeda, however different in behaviour and personality, had dark hair, and powerful brown eyes behind which hid certain strength of character and will. My eyes, on the other hand, were blue, and my blond hair lacked the elegance of their curls. From birth I was thought to be very fragile, and it seemed only fit to my mother to break with family tradition and name me after a flower. That's how I became Narcissa.

I grew to be exactly what was expected of me, and in 1960, I was a delicate little girl, naïve and more vulnerable than any of my sisters would ever be. I was three years old, by which time I should have grown used to my parents' quarrels, perhaps, but they frightened me almost more than anything in the world. My oldest memory is of one of those nights, when I was awakened by my mother's harsh voice, shouting things at my father I wish I could forget. Soon I could hear objects, which sounded like the expensive porcelain, banging and crashing against the walls of the upper floor, and I sat over the valance of my bed, terrified, holding my knees and pulling them closer to my body. I was crying when both my sisters walked in.

Andromeda closed the door behind them, as soon as they were both inside, and rushed to an armchair, away from my bed. She sat there alone, very quietly, looking up at the ceiling as if she could follow father's movements back and forth instead of merely listening to his heavy steps. Andy had always been very self-sufficient. She would spend her days alone, playing outside in the gardens, and eventually, escaping the manor to watch other's people's daily lives. Since those early years, she was not as proud of being a Black as she should be, and the costs of bearing such a name seemed too expensive for her to pay. It was her way, and I loved her.

Bellatrix, for her part, walked towards me and climbed my bed as soon as she entered the bedroom. She was five or six years old then, a beautiful dark-haired little girl, tall for her age, and remarkably brave! I do not know if she could understand our parents' fights, but I know she didn't fear them. There were no tears on her face, no pain in her eyes, only concern about her youngest sister, crying so desperately it almost hurt. She placed her arms around me, pulling me closer to her body, and I laid my head on her chest, my tears falling free all over her nightgown.

"Bella, I'm scared."

"Shhhh," Bella whispered, "I know, Cissy, I know..." she said softly, holding me tight, using the nickname she would continue to use even way after we were older and a bit too grown up for such endearments.

She didn't say everything was going to be fine. I suppose even then she did not believe that, and Bella never lied to me. But I knew she would protect me, and I didn't feel so scared anymore. It didn't even occur to me that there was very little a six year old could do to protect an even younger child from the wrath of two adult wizards, if it came to that. Bella was special; she had ways to protect me. She would keep me safe. And I would protect her no matter what.

That night, I fell asleep in my sister's arms. She didn't let go of me, not even for a second, and several hours passed until the struggle upstairs lost strength and faded away.

Once there was silence in the manor, Bella laid down on my bed, hugging me from behind. I called Andy to join us. My middle sister sat on the floor, next to the bed, resting her head over the mattress, and held my hand. I knew I had nothing to fear, and soon, my eyes felt heavier. It was only a few seconds before I slipped out of reality, that I felt Bella's kiss on the top of my head. She said, "I love you, Cissy", without sound, and I knew I would always love her.

We might not have been meant for happiness, but whatever was to happen in the years that came, I knew we would always have each other.

* * *

 ** _ ** _A/N:_**_** _I have_ _started this story again (november / 2016), with several corrections to the dates and years in which things took place (I made a mistake before)._ _ _Somebody dared me to write a story from Narcissa's point of view, a long time ago, and that's how this story was born.__

 _ _I wanted this story to sound like "Vallerie's letter", from V for Vendetta. There will be several chapters, all of them depicting an episode of Cissy's past, painting the colours that make her who she is. I'm also attaching quotes by Marylin Monroe in the beginning of every chapter. I think she verbalized quite well how troubling it is to be a girl, sometimes, and I wanted to share that in my stories.__

 _ _Please review...__

 _ _LLAP__


	2. 1959

_****Disclaimer**** : The ideas are mine, the characters belong to JK..._

* * *

" _For a long time I was scared I'd find out I was like my mother."_

 ** _ **Marilyn Monroe**_**

* * *

 **Chapter 1 - 1959**

The eldest son of a man of great fortune is his heir. His younger sons are his legacy. His daughters are his ambassadors. My father had three ambassadors to represent his interests within other wealthy Pureblood families, and he intended to prepare us well for that task.

In the years that preceded Hogwarts, my sisters and I had a thorough education. Our father gave value to tradition, and the young women of the Black family had a reputation for being accomplished, according to the highest standards in existence, for several generations, ever since the dawn of the 19th century. Bellatrix, Andromeda, and I received instruction in singing, drawing, music, and dancing from the finest wizard masters in Europe, not to mention lessons on the modern languages and preliminary classes to History of Magic, Magic Theory, and Genealogy of the Black family. We were also encouraged to improve our minds through extensive reading.

My father spoiled us, providing for our every wish, but he never loved any of his daughters as he would have loved the son that would carry the family name, a son that was never born. Twice during my childhood my mother said she was expecting a boy, but none of those infants survived more than a few weeks in her womb, if indeed they existed. Today, as I look back to those events I realize they probably didn't. Needless to say my father was far from understanding in these matters.

I remember the second time well. My mother said, during dinner, we would have a little brother running around the house soon. I smiled, thinking of being to that little boy what Bella was to me, and I asked, naively enough where was he.

"On his way," my mother answered vaguely, and I could see her touching her abdomen, though by that time the gesture meant nothing at all to me.

"Are you certain?" My father asked, in a hopeful tone of voice I seldom had the chance to hear.

"A woman is always sure of such things, Cygnus," was her answer. I was not old enough to understand those words, but they scared me a little. It was the first time I realized how hard it could be to be a woman, and in the years that followed I would be very glad I had sisters to stand by me through the experience.

My father's happiness, however overwhelmingly contagious, was short lived, because no longer after that announcement, mother fell ill. Or so I was told. They had to give my sisters and I some explanation as to why our mother had locked herself in her room sobbing painfully and the talks of a new baby in the house suddenly ceased.

Father was so angry. He closed himself inside his office, and Uncle Orion was the only one who dared go after him. "I should never have married a Rosier," my father shouted, and I remember listening to loose words, such as "liar", "sterile", and "weak".

In later years I learnt that something like that had happened before, when I was a baby, and although I was too young to remember the first time, I have no reason to believe it was any different. It happened in 1959, I was told, and my father retreated to his office for weeks, even refusing to eat dinner at the family's table. His wrath was only appeased when Aunt Walburga gave birth to a baby boy, several months later.

There was a big celebration at 12 Grimmauld Place, a few days after Sirius' birth, in which his name was magically written with gold in the family's tapestry. There had been a celebration like that for me about two years earlier, as there had been for my sisters before me. It was a family tradition, established when the tapestry was first commissioned, several years earlier.

It is not difficult for me to extrapolate how exhilarated everybody must have been that there was, at last, an heir for the Black's empire. Everybody, that is, except for my mother. It pained her that her husband's sister had been able to give Cygnus something it was her obligation to provide; as little as she cared about the continuation of the Black's lineage. And she didn't bother to hide those emotions from anyone.

Father was quite smitten by Sirius. It was he who suggested the name, inspired by the brightest star in the night sky, in accordance to our family tradition. It was also father who suggested that the boy's second name should be Orion, for he believed a first born should bare the name of his father. In every other respect, he behaved as if Sirius was as much his son as uncle Orion's and to be fair, uncle Orion treated us as if we were his daughters as well… That unity was the strength of our family and I don't think any of us truly understood back then how much of our power and wealth depended on it.

There are many photographs of that day, but one in particular is my favourite. My father had summoned my sisters and I to get a closer look at Sirius, wrapped in many green blankets and someone chose that moment to take a picture. Aunt Walburga sits in the middle, holding the baby in her right arm, while her left arm passes around Andromeda's shoulders my sister seated to her left, pushing her niece closer to her body. Andy was three years old then, and she used one of her hands to open up the blankets a little, so she could get a better look at the baby. She's smiling in the picture, and sometimes, the baby grabs one of her fingers in his tiny hands. My father is sitting to Andy's left, watching her curiosity towards the baby with satisfaction. It is one of the few photographs in which he is holding me in his arms, my head laying on his shoulder as I slept. Uncle Orion is sitting on the other side, to his wife's right, whispering something in Bella's ear, my eldest sister sitting on his lap, watching the baby as well. It is such a beautiful portrait of our family.

I don't remember much of my early childhood. I don't suppose anyone does. Perhaps we're not meant to remember the earliest years of our lives. Perhaps if we could remember every detail, somehow the magic of childhood would be lost. All the romantic nostalgia that surrounds the past would be reduced to the same messy pile of debris that are our adult lives...

But sometimes I browse through albums of photographs of those days, and I can't help but wish I remembered things more fully. Everything seemed so much simpler then. And we seemed happy.

* * *

 _ **A/N:** I realize I may have disappointed some readers with the long time it took me to get back to this story. In my defense, please, understand, it's not an easy story for me to write. I am a twenty-something girl, but I have no sisters, and I never had any best girl friends, so I can't drawn from experience to write these lines. I have to imagine what I think sisterly affection should be like instead, and I'm never sure if these chapters sound artificial or not. I hope not. Please understand that sometimes it takes me longer than I expected to post new chapters, but I do not intend to give up on this story, and I sincerely hope you don't give up on reading._

 _Reviews are very welcome_


	3. 1960

_**DISCLAIMER:** The ideas are mine, the characters, sadly are not._

* * *

 _"I always felt insecure and in the way, but most of all I felt scared. I guess I always wanted love more than anything else in the world."_

 ** _Marilyn Monroe_**

* * *

 **Chapter 2 - 1960**

By 1960, it was understood that I was old enough to accompany the family to an official function. I was three years old then, and no longer stumbling upon my own legs as I walked, already begging for a toy broomstick as a present. Not because I really wanted one – the farthest thing from it, actually, to be honest, the idea of flying frightened me a little – but both my sisters had their own broomsticks and I did not wish to be left behind.

I was the last one to get ready, and the entire family watched as I walked in the fireplace room dressed in my new burgundy dress with a black silk belt and a black bow for my hair.

"Narcissa, fix your bow," mother said, almost as soon as I entered, and I tried, clumsily, to adjust my bow, not quite knowing what was wrong with it.

"Here, Cissa," aunt Walburga said, helping me with it and fixing the bow with a wave of her wand, "Doesn't she look beautiful, Cygnus?"

"Like a princes," my father answered. It made me smile.

"Shall we go, then?" Uncle Orion asked, and in a few moments we were on our way.

My father had made a significant donation in the name of the family to a new children's wing at St Mungus Hospital, and it was expected that we attended the inauguration. A high platform had been set up and that's where my mother and father stood, next to my two older sisters. Bella and Andy were part of the ceremony, as they would give one present each to two of the children who hospitalized. It was a symbolic gesture, representing the donations and it followed my father's short but engaging speech as did the wave of applause and approval given by the crowd to his words.

I was considered too young to be on the stand, it was my first official function after all, and I watched from the side, along with my aunt and uncle. My sisters carried two big boxes adorned with large colourful bows and deposited them in front of two of the children in the front row, which again was followed by a round of applause. Secretly I was happy to no be with them. I had never seen so many people before, and something about the crowed scared me. Before I knew I was stepping back so that my back was pressed against my uncle's legs and I heard him whisper something I couldn't quite make out in his wife's years before he knelt down and placed one of his arms around me.

"Cissa, is everything okay?" he asked, and I nodded that it was, but he must have seen that I was scared because he didn't stand up. Instead, uncle Orion pulled me closer to him and pointed at the higher platform discreetly, while whispering to my ear: "There, see? That little girl is going to give the flowers to your mother. That symbolizes the people's gratitude to our family."

"It's a present," I said simply.

"Yes, a present. They are saying thanks to us, and your father in particular."

"Why?"

"Well, your father has donated gold that made it possible for the Hospital to build this wing. Now it will be possible for more children to get treatment here, and their care will improve, even if their families can't afford their treatments."

"But won't we run out of gold?" I asked, and I must have sounded concerned because my uncle laughed gently,

"No, princess," he whispered, kissing my face softly, "you don't have to worry about that. We're Black."

I watched as my mother waved, thanking the crowd for her flowers and sending the little girl away, thinking about my uncle's words. I was far to young to make sense of any of it, but I was trying to pay attention and remember his words. Mostly because repeating what the grown ups said to my sisters made me feel quite grown myself.

"See that?" My uncle continued, pointing at my father and Bella, together, disclosing a new oil painting in the wall, and a silve plaque that read 'The Arcturus Wing', "that's a portrait of your great-uncle Arcturus."

"Arcturus," I repeated, looking at the man, and I remember thinking that he looked very young

"He was my father. When I wup as about your age, he taught me that the Black are special, are different from the common crowd. Ordinary men do not have to worry about using their gold to build hospital wings but we do have a responsibility to make our world better. It is because of that that the people respect our line and birth. Do you see the way they look at your father? One day, they will look at you like that."

Father was busy shaking hands with the Hospital director while a photographer of the Daily Prophet took their picture. He did seem very impressive up there, but he impressive most of the time, at least to me. I looked up at my uncle, still holding on to his right hand and saw him pulling aunt Walburga closer and kissing her lips softly. I squeezed his hand a little tighter and he stroke my hair gently… I thought about what he said, about the way people would look at me one day, and I wondered if it was also certain that on day someone would kiss me on the lips as my aunt had just been kissed.

Now my father had his hand on Bella's shoulder as they posed for a photograph. She looked very much like him, with her long dark curls and charming smile. Beauty was a hereditary trait in our family. The Blacks were tall, lean, well built, and so obviously noble it was not rare for lesser people to behave lowly in our presence. Even Sirius, who was but a baby at the time, too small even to be brought to that event, had dark, meaningful eyes, and in the years that followed he would prove to be a Black by his appearance, if nothing else.

My sisters too had inherited those darkly handsome traits, and I often grieved for looking so much like my mother. I wanted to be beautiful. Although my appearance had something aristocratic as well - no one could deny that, - I lacked the long, lustrous, dark hair, the dark eyes, and that casualness of elegance that others found so attractive. The one trait I did share, which was undeniably hereditary, was unfortunately not quite as visible as the others: a proud, dark heart, filled with prohibited emotions and dangerous memories.

* * *

 _ **A/N:** This is a new chapter, I wrote it last night (november the 21st, 2016)._

 _LLAP_


	4. 1961

_**DISCLAIMER:** The ideas are mine, the characters, sadly are not._

* * *

 _"I am invariably late for appointments - sometimes as much as two hours. I've tried to change my ways but the things that make me late are too strong, and too pleasing."_

 _ **Marilyn Monroe**_

* * *

 **Chapter 2 - 1961**

"Where is your sister?" the professor asked, checking the time, but neither myself, nor Bella could offer a response.

We had been waiting for Andromeda for about fifteen minutes already. Bella and I were sitting, side by side, wearing beautiful robes recently made for us at our mother's request, and we each held a small notebook in our laps. It was time for our weekly lesson on Theory of Magic and Andromeda was late…

There is no elementary school for the children of wizards. Many children of inferior birth attend muggle schools in the years that precede Hogwarts, but that was, of course, out of the case for us. For the most part, our education was handled by family. Aunt Walburga supervised our curriculum herself, and it was her who instructed us on the genealogy of our family. Uncle Ignatius, who came from a long line of public men in the Wizardry World, was our teacher in the matters of politics. But there were other teachers. My sisters and I – and, in time, our little cousins, Sirius and Regulus, - had some of the best private tutors in Britain.

Adalbert Wafling himself was our instructor in magical theory, and I still have his notes on my essay about the Fundamental Laws of Magic. In fact, that afternoon, it was he who was waiting with Bellatrix and I for Andromeda's arrival.

"Late again, Adromeda," professor Adalbert said, fixing the spectacles over the bridge of his nose.

"I'm sorry, professor," she said, taking a seat to my left. Andromeda looked quite dishevelled, her face was flustered, as if she'd run to get there and her hair had not been brushed.

"Andromeda, dear, there's something in your hair," ant Lucretia said, removing a small branch from Andy's hair and brushing it with her own fingers, "where have you been?"

"Very well, I believe when we last spoke we were discussing the Fundamental Laws of Medicine. Let's start with Bellatrix. We talked about the ethical implications of the first law. Now, did you did your research in the meaning of ethics?"

And almost immediately Bellatrix started repeating the concepts she had memorized without even having to glance at the notes in her notebook. Those were unusual lessons we had. There was of course, an age gap between us, so, although we usually sat down and listened to the professor's talk on the same topic, we had very different assignments to keep us busy the rest of the week. Bellatrix' assignments had the highest degree of complexity, as she was the elder. Andromeda's tasks were a bit simpler, and then finally, myself, barely four years old, and still learning to read. But we all listened to the same talks and lectures, and we all payed attention and I certainly pretended to understand everything to much a deeped level than I could actually grasp, mostly because I was so terrified to be left behind.

Andy and I listened quietly as Bella and the professor talked about the subject of Ethics, until finally he turned to my other sister, adjusting his spectacles again.

"Yes, very well, Bellatrix. Now, Andromeda, did you prepare the essay on the interpretations of the first law?"

Andy was quiet for a moment. Then she made the most imperceptible nod.

"Well, may I see it?" He asked, reach out with his hand and expecting her to handle him a piece of parchment or something of the sort.

"I forgot," Andy said, finally.

"You forgot?" He asked incredulous, "Andromeda, this is the third time in three weeks you do not bring your assignment, I'm afraid I shall have to communicate your father about this. Now, Narcissa, did you copy down the laws in your notebook? Could you read them aloud for me?"

I started reading them, dutifully, but Andromeda interrupted us.

"Well, I will tell my father on you too!" She said to the teacher, in a daring voice.

"Miss Black, don't interrupted your sister," he said harshly, "you may report whatever you with to your father, after we are done."

"I will!" she continued, "like, why don't you teach us, some real things, some useful things?"

"Don't you believe that the fundamental laws of magic are 'useful things'?"

"They're just a buch of laws that you made up. Ibet you don't know anything about… mathematics!"

He chuckled.

"Miss Black, what could you possibly know about mathematics?"

"Well, I happen to know a lot about mathematics, look," she said, proudly, opening up her notebook and showing several pages full of small numbers and mysterious simbles, almost as if she'd been hoping the professor would ask that.

"Where did you learn this?" He asked gravely, turning the pages slowly.

"Does it matter? Everybody knows these things, why not we?"

"Everybody? Like whom?" He insisted.

"Well," Andy bit her lip, she seemed to be debating something in her own head, "like muggle kids, for instance."

There was some silence in the room. The professor folded the notebook and handled it back to her.

"There are many types of knowledge, miss Black. It is unreasonable to expect every person to know it all. Now don't you think it is reasonable to assume that the things learnt by non magical children are not exactly things that would be useful for a young witch like yourself?"

Andromeda had no answer to that.

"Now, Narcissa, if you'll continue, please. I believe you were reading the second law."

Our lesson ended rather quickly after that and we all went up to Andromeda's room while professor Waffling talked to our father. In the beginning I was trying to listen to the conversation dowstairs, but that became impossible because Bella wouldn't quit until Andy told her where had she learnt all those things about numbers.

"I am not telling you, Bella, because you'll tell on me!"

"If you have been visiting that-" Bella started, but Andy didn't let her finish.

"Do you want to learn multiplication or not?" Andromeda asked, finally.

The two of them stared at each other for a long while. Then Bella seemed to quit and the two of them opened the notebook again, with Andromeda teaching Bella what she had leant. I just sat in her rug, brushing the hair of one of her dolls, not at all interested in all of those numbers or in how Andy might have learnt them. I was just happy my sisters and I were together, different however we might be from each other.

There would be several times in later years when I would wonder how it was possible that three girls raised in the same house, taught the same values and exposed to the same influences might have turned out so radically different from each other. It took me a long time to understand why.

In spite of our upbringing, our character lies in our own hands. I understand that now.

* * *

 _ **A/N:** Yet another brand new chapter (november the 22nd, 2016). _

_LLAP_


	5. 1962 - Spring

_**_**DISCLAIMER:**_**_ _ _The ideas are mine, the characters belong to JK... If I had been the one to write the story, most of the action would probably have happened in the marauders age.__

* * *

 _ _"This life is what you make it. No matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you're going to mess it up."__

 _ _ **Marilyn Monroe**__

* * *

Capter 4 - 1962

Andromeda was a wayward girl.

As a child I often wondered how it was possible that Andy should be so very different from Bella and I. After all, the three of us were brought up in the same house, exposed to the same influences, and - to a degree - put on the same path. In the years that came each of us would stray from that path somehow, but Andromeda was the one to do it first.

At the age of six she was already a little rebel. She snuck into the kitchen to eat chocolate frogs when no one was watching, stayed awake well after her bed time and climbed the shelves of the library to reach for books we were not allowed to read. When we were at the dinner table, Andy was always the one to ask the forbidden or the inappropriate questions. It was not unusual for Bella and me to find ourselves laughing in spite of Mother's furious expression. Andy was something else... She was daring, and so full of life!

Bella and I knew that Andy liked to leave the house and explore the property, but usually she returned before any of the adults could notice she was missing. There was a time in the spring of 1962 however, when things happened a little differently.

"Orion's on his way. Have you found her yet?" Aunt Walburga asked as soon as she stepped out of the fire place, holding my father's arm for support.

"No," Mother answered harshly.

"I have looked through the gardens and she's not there," Father added.

"This has happened before, has it not?" Uncle Orion asked, as soon as he stepped out of the fireplace. I noticed he didn't stumble or lose balance like Aunt Walburga had. And although he was looking straight at my father when he spoke he took a step forward and placed an arm behind his wife's back, supporting her and it was only then that she let go of my father's arm. Aunt Walburga had never been slim, but she looked absolutely large now. Even under her dark robes I could see the curve of her belly, and she needed her husband's assistance to steady herself after spinning so many times in the fireplace. In fact, even with his assistance she still seemed a little dizzy.

"Yes, but as soon as we realise she's missing we usually fiund her hiding in the kitchens or somewhere else around the house," Mother explained, pacing nervously.

"And she-" Aunt Walburga started, but she stopped suddenly, holding her abdomen with one hand and taking the other one to her mouth as though she was going to be sick, "I'm sorry. She's definitely not in the house?" Aunt Walburga asked, finally, and she seemed to have regained control, although I could see uncle Orion watching her closely.

"No," my father answered, "Walburga, are you sure you-?".

"I am fine, Cygnus, it is Andromeda that-" she started, but didn't seem able to conclude her line of thought before shaking off her husband's arm, and walking away "oh, excuse me."

"Do you need me to-" Uncle Orion started, but she simply shook her head no and walked as fast as she could towards the rest room.

My father was looking at uncle Orion, clearly concerned.

"The floo network has been making her sick for the past few weeks," my uncle explained, trying to make my father at ease.

"Ah, Walburga," my father still sounded worried, "she didn't have to come."

"You should be worried about your daughter," my mother said sharply.

"Do you think for a moment that I am not?" Father asked angrily.

Uncle Orion stepped forward and touched my father's arm.

"You have a determined sister, Cygnus. Andromeda is missing. Nothing could have kept Walburga in the house. Your sister will be fine, this has happened before," he said firmly, "Let's just worry about my niece now."

Father nodded.

"Well, she's not in the house," my mother said angrily, "when I catch her, I will-"

"The house-elves haven't seen her. We have cast Homenum Revelium charms in every corner of this house. She is not here," Father interrupted.

"What about the rest of the property?"

"She's not anywhere close to the house, but the property is far too large to search by foot, and there's only so much I can do with spells from here."

"What if we used broomsticks?"

Father pondered the question for a moment.

"It could be done. I can search the North side of the property, that's the one that stretches the farthest. Druella can take the East."

"I could search the West side," Uncle Orion said immediately. "Walburga and I left Sirius with Lucretia, and Ignatius should be getting here soon, he could search the South."

"We can't wait..." Mother protested.

"That's right, we can't wait for him," Aunt Walburga had returned, she looked a little flustered but otherwise unharmed. "I will search the south."

Both my father and uncle looked at her in disbelief for a moment.

"Love..." Uncle Orion started.

"Walburga, you can't fly a broomstick in your condition!" My father sounded exhasperated.

"My condition?" she sounded angry, "what do you mean, brother? Do you think I am sick, Cygnus?"

Father didn't speak for a second. He could tell he'd said the wrong thing.

"No," he started in a low voice, trying to make amends, "but we are in a difficult situation already. I don't want anything to happen to you either."

"I am perfectly capable of flying a broomstick," she started.

"We know, love," Uncle Orion stepped closer, "but at seven months you shouldn't outstretch yourself like that. Besides, someone has to stay behind in case Andromeda returns; not to mention someone has to watch the girls."

"What?" Bellatrix asked, speaking for the first time, running downstairs and giving away our hiding spot at the top of the staircase. "I don't want to stay behind! I want to help!"

I ran after her.

"Me too!"

Right at that moment, green flames appeared out of thin air in the fireplace and Uncle Ignatius stepped right out of them.

"I'm here, how can I help?"

The adults exchanged a quick look as my father started to brief uncle Ignatius on their plan and my mother summoned the broomsticks. Uncle Orion allowed himself to stay behind a few seconds to exchange a few more words with his wife.

"I should be going," aunt Walburga started sadly, "if anything should happen to her..."

"We will find her, love," Orion said, lifting my aunt's chin with his finger and kissing her softly in the lips, "I promise. Don't worry, please. The girls need you to be calm now. And our little one as well."

She nodded, and before they could say anything else Bellatrix tried to run past them, but she clashed against uncle Orion's legs and fell down which gave aunt Walburga enough time to grab her arm.

"Let me go!" Bella yelled, trying to shake off Aunt Walburga's hand. "I don't want to stay behind."

"Bellatrix, you can't go!" Aunt Walburga said firmly, holding my sister's wrist.

"Let. Me. Go!" Bella said again, shaking her arm violently at each word.

"Bella, stop," Uncle orion said, kneeling down to talk to her, "I know you are worried about Andy, but I promise you we are going to find her. Everything is going to be fine."

"I can fly a broomstick too, I can help!" She insisted.

"I know, darling," uncle Orion continued, "but I need you to stay here to look after your aunt and your little sister for me. Do you think you can do that?"

Bella considered that for a moment and nodded, although she still didn't seem happy about the arrangement.

"Everything is going to be fine, baby girl," Uncle Orion said, and after a soft kiss on Bella's forhead and a meaningful look to my aunt, he left the house quickly to join the search.

Aunt Walburga straightened her back and took a couple of deep breaths, one of her hands still on her belly. Then she walked over to Bellatrix, who had turned her back on us, and hugged my sister from behind, pulling her closer. They stood like that for a minute or two before my aunt looked around looking for me.

"Come, Cissy, let's go into the other room," she said, and lead the way, holding me by the hand while keeping her right arm around Bella's shoulder. When we reached the sitting room, aunt Walburga sat down in a large armchair by the window. She conjured some hot chocolate and a few mugs, but none of us feel like having any.

I sat on the rug, and Bella climbed the window seat and hugged her knees, staring outside as if she hoped she would she see Andromeda walking back to the house at any moment.

And for the longest time, we waited. From time to time our aunt reassured us that everything was going to be fine, but other than that, none of us spoke at all. The only thing breaking the silence were the sounds of my aunt shifting uncomfortably in her seat, as I watched from the corner of my eyes, and the relentless tick tack of the wall clock behind us.

Bella kept glancing at the clock. I did that as well, even though I couldn't really tell the time, and I only turned my eyes away from the clock when I heard my aunt trying to stand up from her counch. Twice she tried and failed to pull herself up and then she had to stop for a moment and catch her breath, before she finally succeeded in standing up with a hand on her lower back. Wanting to help, I walked towards her chair and stood in front of my aunt, but she must have understood that I wanted to be picked up because she stroke my hair and said:

"Oh, baby, auntie can't pick you up right now, you're too big for that. Here climb up here," she said, indicating the window seat, and I did. Standing up there I was almost as tall as my aunt. She looked at my face for a moment and smiled a me. Then she hugged me. I loved when she did that. My mother wasn't an affectionate woman at all and she had never been given to hugs. But I do remember my aunt's hugs very well. I remember she kissed the top of my head that night and told me everything was going to be fine. And I wrapped my arms around her middle as bast as I could, laying my head against her chest for comfort I didn't even realized I needed.

We stood like that for a long time, while my aunt stroke my hair, comforting me, before she pulled me away for a minute.

"Cissy? Baby? Your aunt needs to walk around the room for a little while, okay, princess?" She asked, softly.

I just nodded, and sat back down watching her as she walked around the room, resting one hand on her belly. I was still watching her when Bella finally moved on her spot, getting closer to the window glass.

"It's Andy!" she said suddenly, and ran out of the room. I jumped from my chair and followed her, to meet Andy in the hall. It took several moments for Aunt Walburga to catch up with us.

"Andromeda! Are you alright?" she asked, walking towards my sister as fast as she could. "I have to send your father a message. Is everything alright?"

Before long the rest of the adults were back. Andomeda couldn't understand what that fuss was all about. She said she'd been playing with her broomstick in the woodlands, and had simply lost track of time… Our father couldn't understand how she could have walked back and not have seen him, or triggered one of his tracking spells. Mother said Andy would be punished; she knew she wasn't supposed to wander off like that. They had to send messages to the rest of the family, to let them known that everything was okay and Father asked the elves to serve the table in the large dining room after Aunt Walburga agreed not to floo back straight away.

Only Bella looked at Andy with narrow eyes, as if she knew something wasn't quite right.

It took my parents a few years to discover that the reason their spells failed to locate Andy that night was that she had been exploring the Muggle village down the road.

* * *

 _ ** _ **A/N:**_**_ __ _ _By all means, do review ^^ LLAP__


	6. 1962 - Later that Year

_**_**DISCLAIMER:**_**_ _ _The ideas are mine, the characters belong to JK... If I had been the one to write the story, most of the action would probably have happened in the marauders age.__

* * *

 _ _"Sometimes I think it would be easier to avoid old age, to die young, but then you'd never complete your life, would you? You'd never wholly know you."__

 ** _ _ **Marilyn Monroe**__**

* * *

It's safe to say I had a very sheltered childhood, having almost no contact with the world outside the walls of our house. Our family was very tight, and our upbringing reflected that. My sisters, my cousins and I were brought up as siblings, in many ways, much like my father and Uncle Orion had. It is true I didn't see much of Aunt Lucretia when I was growing up, but it was no exaggeration to say that Aunt Walburga was like a second mother to my sisters and I. I am certain she loved us as the daughters she never had.

In the years to come, I would discover my aunt could be a ferocious woman. She had, like most in our family, very strong opinions about blood purity, and she expressed those opinions more colourfully than anyone I'd ever known. She had a very low tolerance for disobedience or for anything that threatened the House of Black. I saw her draw her wand to inflict pain in lesser creatures far more than once. When she became angry it was like there was a fire burning in her eyes.

Thinking back, it's almost odd to realise that she was the same woman who read me bedtime stories and hugged me so tenderly when I was a little girl. Sure, she was impatient, opinionated and a little too loud, but she was also gentle and wise. She was always someone I could talk to; always had a friendly word to offer. Now that I am older, I realise that young girls need older women they can look up to and ask for advice. I was lucky to find that in my aunt. She was a strong woman, a powerful which, and I loved her.

It was unusual that, as the winter of 1961 drew near, my sisters and I saw very little of our aunt. She hardly ever came to the house anymore. When I asked my father about it, he told me she couldn't come. It was a woman thing, he said, and my mother should be the one to tell me about it.

* * *

"Perhaps I should take the girls home," my father suggested, looking at us in the farthest corner of the room.

He had brought my sisters and I to 12 Grimmauld Place that day. Sirius had run into the room almost as soon as we arrived, but Uncle Orion left to call his wife and it took a few minutes for Aunt Walburga to come downstairs. When she did, my father walked towards her and the two of them spoke in whispers in a futile effort to keep us from hearing their words.

"Don't be silly, Cygnus," she said softly.

"If something should happen..."

"Cygnus, there are at least three more weeks before we have to worry about that," Aunt Walburga was smiling now.

"I brought the girls here so that you would have some company, but if they should tire you... I think Bellatrix and Andromeda understand, but Narcissa is young..."

"Your daughters are three little angels, Cygnus," Aunt Walburga reassured him. "Besides, Andy has a talent for getting Sirius to settle down, and Merlin knows I need some help with that boy..."

Sirius smiled. He'd recently discovered that the scent of pepper imps made his mum feel sick and he'd been enjoying himself with that knowledge for the past few weeks. Whenever Aunt Walburga was around, Sirius pulled two or three pepper imp bags from his pockets and opened them up all at once. Uncle Alphard had given him several boxes of those Honeydukes treats, and Sirius had hidden them in strategic places around the house so that his parents could not confiscate his stash. He laughed out loud, smoking at his ears and nose while his mum struggled to stand up and run to the loo as fast as she could. Uncle Orion had scolded him for that, but judging from Sirius' smile I don't think it did much good.

"Well, if you're sure..." Father continued.

"She will be okay," Uncle Orion intervened, "won't you love?" He kissed his wife softly on the lips, holding both her hands.

"Yes," she half whispered her answer, placing a hand on her belly. "We'll be fine. I just need to sit down for a while."

"We won't be long," Uncle Orion said and, after another meaningful look, the two men left.

Aunt Walburga walked slowly to the armchair by the window. I remember thinking there was something funny about the way she walked, although I couldn't quite say what it was. Sirius could spot it as well. Our eyes met for a moment, and the two of us laughed.

I sat on the floor, but my sisters were already sitting on the other armchairs. Bellatrix occupied the farthest one from the window, and I could spot my sister listening in to the adults' conversation attentively a few minutes earlier. She watched as my aunt walked that funny walk to her chair, though Bella turned her eyes away quickly when she realized I was observing her. It was almost as though she didn't want anyone to know she had been paying attention; as though she was curious about something forbidden. Every now and again Bella glanced at AuntWalburga, looking away quickly as if she didn't want to be caught staring. I had never seen my sister act like that. She changed when we were around Aunt Walburga during those last few months. She was much quieter than usual, much more withdrawn. Sometimes it was like she was lost in thoughts… Other times it was almost like she was afraid of something.

I didn't understand much of what was going on. I didn't ask my aunt any questions; not because I wasn't curious, but because Bella never asked any so I thought it might be the wrong thing to do. But I watched her a lot less discreetly than my sister did. In fact, that night, I watched my aunt as she sat down, and I remember smiling at how funny she looked and wondering why was she doing everything so slowly and awkwardly.

Aunt Walburga didn't see me, though. When she finally sat down, adjusting the cushions behind her she smiled at Andy, on the closest chair. As soon as we had arrived, Sirius had come to us and climbed my sister's chair. There was more than enough space for them to sit next to one another, but Sirius sat on Andy's lap, throwing his tiny arms around her neck and laying his head on her chest. He had one leg on each side of her body, and she was really quiet because she didn't want him to leave but she didn't quite know what to do either.

Sirius looked like he was sleeping on Andy's lap. Looking from the two of them to my aunt I thought I understood why he chose that particular position. Aunt Walburga was so large, there didn't seem to be much of a lap for him to sit on anymore.

We were all very quiet for a minute or two, then I stood up, picked up the book next to me and walked to my aunt. It was a copy of Hogwarts, a History. Aunt Walburga had started reading that to us once we all got tired of the Tales of Beedle the Bard.

Aunt Walburga seemed tired. She had been looking outside the window, one hand carelessly placed on her stomach,when she noticed me offering her the book. She tried to sit up straight without much success, and picked the book from my hands but she almost dropped it.

"I'd forgotten how heavy this was- Ouch," she stopped in the middle of the sentence, leaving the book on the arm of her chair and taking another hand to her side. There was a funny expression on her face, as if she was in pain for a moment, before she looked at me again. "You know what, Cissy? Why don't you read to us tonight, princess?"

I picked up the heavy book and sat on the floor again. I ran my finger through the index page, trying to find an interesting chapter, but no one seemed to be paying much attention to what I was doing anymore. Andy had almost fallen asleep along with Sirius, Aunt Walburga shifted uncomfortably on her seat and Bella seemed distracted, staring out of the window.

I flipped the pages of the book, stopping at the chapter about the Great Hall. My eyes observed a large picture depicting the enchanted ceiling of the room for a moment, but my thoughts were not on the book anymore. I was thinking about my aunt's condition, and wondering if she'd been forced to go through that. It did seem truly awful, and I'd noticed she barely even used her wand anymore. Glancing back at her discreetly, I wondered if all girls were forced to go through that at some point. I didn't want to stop liking pepper imps or to start eating large amounts of grass flavoured Bertie Bott's beans. Not to mention not being able to use my wand (after waiting so long to finally have one) or even to just walk properly.

"The Great Hall," I read out loud, but for the first few paragraphs my mind was not in the words. I remembered my father telling me that it was a 'woman thing', a few days earlier, and my stomach felt queasy. Casting another look at Aunt Walburga's distressed figure I hoped, for a moment, that what was happening to her would never happen to me.

* * *

 _ ** _ **A/N:**_**_ _ _Yay, another chapter... It's wonderful to see this story moving forward (specially considering I didn't have the best of records when it comes to finishing multi-chapters). Anyway, the past couple of chapters have been about how tight their family is, not just mother and father and daughters, but actually, uncle, aunt and cousin as well. I actually wrote this chapter around the same time I wrote 'In Purgatory's Shadow', about Bellatrix escape from Azkaban, and there's a small mention of something she learnt from her aunt Walburga. Also, I have been trying to write Walburga and Orion as more tridimentional characters (their chapter on my Fallen Angels collection was all about that as well).__

 _Please Review._


End file.
